Monday, July 20, 2009

Last night I dreamed that I lost both my kids on the beach. I was frantic and ran to the police station to report it. There I was told that I had to wait 24 hours to file a missing persons report. I insisted that they couldn't make it 24 hours without me but the cop was adamant. It was horrible and I woke up shaking. Guess it doesn't take Freud to figure this one out.
I've always hated the thought of growing older. I come from a long line of women who proudly lie about their age and thought that getting old was one of the worst things that can happen ( aside from the alternative-nod to Kane). Now I'm discovering another horror- having your kids getting older. While I am amazingly proud of the incredible people they are growing into I get sad as they need me less and less and as their lives become less weaved into mine. My D is off to Italy for 4 months and I can not wrap my head around the fact that I will not be seeing her for so long and won't be talking to her all the time! Is it too late to say I changed my mind about letting her go? draft